"Breadfruit this with me."

I am in the middle of the most surreal conversation I think I've ever had. Here's the set-up:

A long while ago someone added me to their MSN list. The email looked semi-familiar so I just assumed it was someone I hadn't talked to in a really long time. But lately I've been wondering... Just who is this person? So tonight I said hello, and who are you? Here is the transcript of the following conversation. Nothing has been changed, but editorial comments have been added.

Andrew says:
Hello, This may seem strange, but you've been on my MSN list for a while now and for the life of me, I can't remember who you are!

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
yerana

Andrew says:
Ok, you'll have to forgive me but I'm still struggling... How do we know each other?

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
na entendei mba'eve (no Spanish translation available)

(Long Pause)

Andrew says:
Do you speak English?

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
yes yes

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
rapo

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
raul

Andrew says:
Where did we meet?

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
no (animated nodding smiley)

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
soy la novia de piratita (Translation: I am the pirate's fiance)

Andrew says:
You're the Pirate's Fiance?

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
yes

Andrew says:
Who is the Pirate?

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
are you raul on the rocks?

Andrew says:
No, I'm Andrew... on a chair.

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
y a mi que ?? (Translation: And that??)

Andrew says:
I don't really speak Spanish all that well...

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
you got to largar your join (Larger = to release)

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
capeshe?

Andrew says:
Largar?

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
yes, epo'i chugui man (No translation available)

Andrew says:
Dude, no idea what that means.

Andrew says:
Where are you?

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
at home

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
you?

Andrew says:
I'm at my home. Are you in Canada?

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
i'm in lomapyta, are you supos to be in remansito? (Lomapyta and Remansito are two towns in Paraguay)

Andrew says:
No, I'm in Canada, in North America. Are you in Paraguay?

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
que?

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
is Adriana?

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
ia adri weth you nowW

Andrew says:
I'm really confused...

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
no, you aren't confuced, you are stoned

Andrew says:
haha, um... ok, let's try again... What is your name?

(Long pause)

Andrew says:
Are you still there?

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
yes

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
my name is esther

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
i'm claudio's girlfriend

Andrew says:
I don't think I know who Claudio is

Andrew says:
Do you know who I am? Or is this really random?

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
yerana raul berton

Andrew says:
No, that's not my name

Andrew says:
My name is Andrew. I live in Canada

Andrew says:
I can't figure out how we know each other

Andrew says:
Did we meet somewhere?

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
barrabas. black rooster and many more

Andrew says:
When was that?

(Another long pause. At this point I gave up trying to make sense)

Andrew says:
Will the Pirate be angry with me for talking with you?

(pause.)

Andrew says:
How is Claudio?

(pause.)

Andrew says:
I like your butterfly picture.

(pause.)

Andrew says:
Did you leave?

(pause.)

Andrew says:
Hello?

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
hello

Andrew says:
What is your favourite colour?

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
black

Andrew says:
What is your favourite animal?

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
the tiger

Andrew says:
Do you like to travel?

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
no

Andrew says:
How old are you?

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
16

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
you?

(Long pause as I consider if I've said or implied anything illegal. Clean. Proceeding with caution...)

Andrew says:
I'm 25. We don't know each other, do we?

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
yes

Andrew says:
How?

Andrew says:
Are we friends?

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
(Animated .gif of two men rocking out on the guitar)

Andrew says:
Do you play guitar?

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
bass guitar

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
like you

(Pause for regrouping)

Andrew says:
Ok, here's what's going on Esther. There has been a mix-up, and we don't really know each other.

(Long pause)

Andrew says:
Do you live in Paraguay?

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
yes

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
(Animated .gif of metalhead rocking out)

Andrew says:
Do you know where Canada is?

(Long pause)

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
me aburris (No translation)

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
chau (No translation)

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
bye

Andrew says:
ok, goodbye Esther... whoever you are.

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
viste que entendes español (Approximate translation: it dresses that entendes Spanish)

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
te pille too (Translation: too pillages to you)

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
raul

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
saludos a adri (greetings to adri)

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
bye

Andrew says:
Tell claudio I said Hello

Andrew says:
bye

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
dalep (No translation)

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
aca esta conmigo (breadfruit this with me)

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
te manda saludos tambien (it also sends greetings to you)

Andrew says:
I don't speak Spanish, so I don't know what that means.

"Esther"= Strellita!!! says:
ok

Andrew says:
ok

(The End?)